I didn't get to go to the ACFW conference this weekend. I missed my friends, the wonderful community of writers.
But on this weekend, I was serving a different community: my church.
As I've mentioned before, our church has been through a tough year that has strained our community to the breaking point and beyond. We've lost almost fifty percent of our membership in six months. Anyone who has ever been through something similar will know what kind of pain this causes.
A few months back, some friends and I were brainstorming about what we could do to help our membership heal and move on. We decided to ask a guest speaker to come in and address us, someone who wasn't burdened by our recent troubles, someone who could remind us what it meant to take joy in our faith and our community. So after church leadership approved the event, I set about finding our speaker. Then a good friend and I proceeded to do what had to be done to make it happen, including fundraising.
He came in to speak to us this weekend. It was everything we could have hoped.
I imagined how we must look to him as he met us in small groups, over meals. Through his eyes, I gained a fresh appreciation for my fellow church members. There are so many good-hearted, gifted people in our conmmunity, and yet we have a tendency to forget the blessings that each person brings to our group, to take for granted their service to others, the things we already know they do. But when a newcomer arrives and sets about figuring out who we are as a group, it can open our eyes to the things we've forgotten.
This was one of our visitor's points, though in this post I can't do justice to his eloquence or humor. He reminded us that to love one another, we need to appreciate and affirm one another's unique gifts and commitment to service. It's not something we can stop because we've known each other for five years, or fifteen, or twenty. Just as the work of our community goes on, so must our appreciation and love for the workers. And it can mean much more to have that work affirmed, quietly and personally, one to another, than to have it acknowledged from a podium.
This Saturday, a bunch of us gathered together, sitting in a circle where we could see each other's faces, and sang. We sang for an hour, and for the first time in months, pure joy filled our gathering. Everyone was smiling. A dear friend came up to me afterward, threw her arms around me, and said something kind. We hugged each other for a long moment. It was one of the best moments of my weekend, the sweetness and joy after the pain.
Real love for one another doesn't just happen because we think we should. It happens because we remember why we love one another. And that is a deeply personal endeavor that calls us to bring our hearts into line with our words.
Do you find real love in one of your communities? What sustains it?
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13 comments:
Wow. What a great thing to write about. Yes. We find true joy in being together just because, in sharing God's love. We forget our main reason for coming together. I felt the love of my community this weekend through a Walk to End Alzheimer's.
It's hard when a community divides. I've been in one. I commend you. Not many people look for ways to heal the situation. Most just wait on the sidelines waiting for something to happen.
I love how you remembered why you love one another and felt the joy that God's love brings...that's the whole key to healing.
How special to see the Lord moving in such a difficult situation. I missed seeing you at ACFW, Rosslyn, but it sounds like you were right where God wanted you.
That's a beautiful post. I really respect people who know when to prioritise their church. I believe the Church can be the most beautiful and healing place on earth, but it takes hard work and commitment to get it to realise its potential.
So, so happy to hear this. Looking forward to seeing you Tuesday. xo
This post really brightened my day. It is so important to be reminded to love proactively, not just when it's easy--because, ironically, that will make it easier and easier.
What a lovely post. I'm glad you had such a great experience. I also find real love in my church. It is such a blessing!
My personal Bible studies lately have been focusing on the body of Christ, how each part is important and how when one part aches we all do/should.
I think it can be difficult to remember to appreciate all the various parts of the body. It's easier to remember to thank the pastoral staff, the nursery staff and others who are more visible. But we forget those behind the scenes who make everything possible, the ones who clean up, who organize events, and so on.
I have been endeavoring to increase my prayers for ALL our church body.
Thank you for the reminder our friendships and love can suffer when we forget to appreciate each other. Thank you also for reminding us to be servants who help heal a situation instead of furthering the hurt.
This is interestingly timed, Rosslyn. We had our annual parish mission last week and the visiting priest talked a lot about love and how it all comes back to that. It's true. But love isn't always easy, and sometimes there is suffering and sacrifice. Sounds like you understand that well. I'm heartened to know that your recent efforts have helped produce some healing moments for your church community. I believe grace was in abundance. Let this be the beginning of more! :)
Thank you for these responses!
Mary - Events to help others are definitely a way to come together.
Loree - I take comfort in knowing we are not alone. Many communities go through this and survive!
Sarah, I wish I had seen you there too. But you're right, I was where I needed to be.
Joanna - I like your faith in the possibility of the church. It can be a refuge and a place of refreshment and renewal, but we often mess it up. So it's good to have a day like this one.
Caroline - See you soon!
Faith - Yes, it's funny how it seems to snowball once it gets going.
Angie - So glad you have real love in your church. :-)
TC - I love your point about the less-visible service.
Roxane - Hear hear!
I'm so sorry your church family has been through such a rough time, Rosslyn. Mine has, too, so I can relate. It's painful to the extreme. I'm thankful that the healing's begun and that the speaker was such a blessing.
Missed you at ACFW. Looking forward to seeing you in Dallas.
I went through a church split about 10 years ago and I was still questioning it, what if'ing it for years afterward. There were moments of healing and joy, but it felt like a divorce to me, I felt like an abandoned child. Friends I'd known for years were gone without even saying goodbye!
How wonderful someday in heaven though we will be reunited without any differences.
Wonderful! I'm not surprised it went so well with him. Hope healing for the community follows. Thanks for posting this.
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