My friend gave me an interesting article last night. The article's author argues that in American churches, we often expect everyone to be happy. There isn't a lot of room for sorrow and brokenness--for the open expression of loss and pain.
I'm not talking about bad attitudes. Habitual complaining is very different from true tragedy and heartbreak. Sometimes people in great sorrow find that their churches don't have channels to allow them to express their pain. They can't find the comfort that community and worship are supposed to offer them.
It's not easy to create a safe community for those who mourn. I've seen churches do it, however.
Worship is another matter. The problem is that different people release their grief through very different kinds of worship. I tend to prefer the African-American style of joyful music that still acknowledges the pain in life. Tradtionally, African-American worship services have been times of affirmation of hope and joy for people who need a lifeline to get through hard times. That sounds good to me! The "happy" songs of gospel music are statements of courage. One of the most moving musical moments of my life was singing "The Battle Belongs to the Lord" with a thousand other people on the Sunday after the terrible events of 9/11.
In a different vein, there are spiritual sorrow songs such as "Were You There," "Sometimes I Feel Like a Motherless Child" and "Steal Away." These are slower, more stately opportunities for emotional expression: musical release for pure pain.
In the Euro-American tradition, we have plenty of joyful songs, but not as many "joy through pain" songs. In recent years, though, some real gems in this vein have appeared: "Blessed Be Your Name," "Days of Elijah," and others that mingle pain with affirmation.
As contemporary music begins to replace old standards, however, we are losing some of the traditional songs of sorrow that we once had in our churches. Pure lament and sadness just aren't in fashion, so contemporary composers don't often write songs like that. The only contemporary one that comes to mind right now is "Above All."
I made a list of some traditional sorrow songs. Can anyone think of others, traditional or contemporary?
Abide With Me
When My Love to Christ Grows Weak
O Sacred Head Now Wounded
How Deep the Father's Love for Us
What a Friend We Have in Jesus
It is Well with My Soul
Night, with Ebon Pinion
Does Jesus Care?
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4 comments:
To me, "Christians Let Us Love One Another" has got to be one of the saddest songs ever, and it has nothing to do with the lyrics, which are actually kind of positive.
It's that Picardy hymn tune! It just makes you SAD. Or at least it makes me sad in that cathartic way you're talking about.
Angie, you bring up an interesting point about the way that lyrics work with melody. For example, "What a Friend We Have in Jesus" is one I had to ponder when it came to making my list. The lyrics are both sorrowful and comforting, but the melody is pretty comforting. I suppose for these borderline songs it depends who's singing them and how. There are also a number of songs in our denomination's musical tradition that have sorrowful or scary words but very bouncy, happy tunes. We don't sing these very much anymore, as you will understand when I tell you that one of these happy, cheerful tunes contains the lyrics: "Many will meet their doom!" It's not very "seeker-sensitive" when we sing about eternal damnation to the merry jingle of a breakfast cereal commercial.
I do agree with you about not having a safe place to experience pain. It is a common error which teaches that anyone who is suffering is in sin or needs to be delivered from a demon. However, Paul expressed his sorrows and struggles continually in his writings, as did David in the Psalms.
Pain makes people uncomfortable, which causes them to distance themselves from those who are hurting.
It is a rare friend indeed who will simply sit with you when you cry.
We once used a hymnal called "Heavenly Highways," one of those hymnals so old that the notes were still shaped. The senior adults in the church loved it because the songs were lively and upbeat, hence the name "The Live Book" that they gave it. I thought of the book as the dead book because all of the songs were about dying and going to Heaven. I found it ironic that a hymnal would be filled of so many upbeat songs singing about death (usually a morbid subject). It really did seem like three fourths of the hymns were about dieing.
On a different note, my wife and I would cringe at some of the bad theology we sang out of that book. And we'd sing those songs because the senior adults liked the lively southern gospel beat the songs had.
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